My last couple of weeks in Shenzhen were really good, with adventures in Macau, going shopping to spend my last few hundred RMB, lovely gatherings, birthday celebration and goodbye dinner, and of course the excitement about going home.
However, as the days to my departure approached, I distanced myself from the joy of seeing my family and instead sunk into a state of minor depression, where I'd sit in my window in Shenzhen just looking out and trying to comprehend that 10,5 months of moving around in the world was coming to an end.
My very last day in China I walked down to the metro station to give Kate a big bag of stuff that she had offered to send home for me as I were having some serious difficulties fitting everything in. As I walked down with Damien Rice on my ipod, being a massive Emo kid, fighting back tears that crept uo from nowhere, I observed everything around me. I remembered when I didn't even know the way to the metro station and now, I know this walk like the back of my hand.
I handed Kate the bag and said goodbye again, before I left to get my last milk tea. I walked up to the counter and ordered it without any further difficulties. She understood me very well.
I didn't leave Shenzhen until 9.30pm that same night. I had to go to Hong Kong airport and stay the night in the airport because my flight was at 7.55am and I had to be checked in by 5am, and there are no bussed leaving the border between mainland and Hong Kong before 6.
I said goodbye to my hostdad and Michelle, and then my hostmum took me to the border. We missed the last bus from Shenzhen bay port, and had to go to Huang Gang. In the bus from the border to the airport I kept thinking that surely this could not be it. There had to be something awaiting me somewhere else than Denmark. Another adventure somewhere ..
The night in the airport was very long, but fortunately they have free wifi, so I skyped a bit with my mum and then made friends with a guy from Las Vegas, who was kind enough to offer me a glass of red wine, which with my empty stomach made me feel incredibly sick. I checked in at 5 and passed security before I fell asleep at the gate.
Fortunately, the plane was rather empty and the guy who was sitting in my row offered to move so that I'd have the entire row to myself. I slept for a good 5-6 hours. Highlight of my day.
We touched down in London 20 minutes behind schedule. I quite literally ran through the arrival hall trying to find the train to London city, because I had 5 hours to spare before my flight to Denmark. I met up with Sarah a friend of mine from primary and then high school, who I haven't seen in ages! Sarah lives in London now, and has done for the past 8 months, we had a wee talk about being away from Denmark, and how going back is like.
I left Sarah in London and caught the train back to the airport. By the time I was on the train, it was dark and it reminded me of my winter in Australia earlier this year, when I was almost always on the train to Ballarat to visit Prue and Steph. It made me so sad, and I wished that the destination of the train would be Ballarat. Unfortunately, the train got into Heathrow airport.
Our plane to Copenhagen was delayed. However, when we touched down the familiarity of the airport made me happy, for a short moment. I got my bag and was thrilled when I saw my parents and my lovely friend Mona, who had even brought a Christmas beer for me.
I have truly been blessed in life with wonderful people!
I woke up the next morning and had a look around the house, which I used to call home, but feels nothing like it at the moment. These past couple of days I have been wondering who I am, where I belong and where I need to be at the moment. There is no simple answer to those questions. It's hard to be here right now at this moment. Some of my best friends have moved away. Everyone has begun new stages of their lifes, let it be uni, or something else. I don't know what I expected of coming back, but I do know one thing. At the moment there is nothing keeping me here. It's not a pleasant feeling to feel like a stranger in your own house, even your own town. Which is another thing I have to get used to: after having lived in cities like Melbourne and Shenzhen my town of 150 people seems a bit anticlimatic.
I guess what I am trying to say is that I miss travelling! What I really hated about China in the beginning is everything I miss now. And of course I miss my dear friends from everywhere around the world.
